Thursday, January 20, 2005

Thursday, January 20, 2005
Waxing Moon
Saturn Retrograde
Sunny and cold

Inauguration Day. How depressing.

Today, I will honor the “Not a Dime” Day and not buy anything at any store, and wear the white ribbon in protest of the war in Iraq while supporting the troops.

I can’t wait to hear about New Orleans’s Jazz Funeral for Democracy!

And the way the media – by that I mean the networks – are trivializing the protests is both disgusting and a breach of journalistic ethics, in my opinion. People are protesting because they love their country and don’t like to see such disrespect for those who are dying mounted on such a massive scale.

I wonder how many soldiers will be killed while all this is going on?

I’ve changed my mind. With all that’s going on, and all the disrespect shown to those who disagree, I COULD be one of the people who turn my back.

Weary – physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Shows were fine yesterday.

Dinner with my friend R., who is in very much the same place I am – ready to leave the theatre, but feeling guilty at wanting to leave something so many people would give anything to participate in. We’ve just outgrown it, that’s all. And we need to work on the next phase of our lives.

It’s getting clearer and clearer that my path lies outside of New York. It may be in Massachusetts – it may be out of the US altogether. We’ll see where the next few months lead me.

I got an issue of Widow’s Chamber written, edited and submitted yesterday before I had to go to the theatre. I’m going to aim for the same today. I’m so far behind, but if I work at it bit by bit, I’ll catch up.

I stole time to work on Ransagh yesterday. Much of it was at the theatre, during breaks, a bit too close to show time, which meant I was fuzzy at the top of the show. I made all my changes, but I knew I wasn’t completely there. I was in the world of Ransagh, and it is not a world that I wished to leave. Partly because, in its political scheme, as things darken, individuals take it upon themselves to create positive change, and that is something I would like to see happen in this world.

Also, the piece fascinates me because all the characters are much richer and complex than I could have hoped. There was a section I wrote yesterday, where it would have followed the formula of the genre for one character to offer comfort to another who is lost and grieving. And yet, the character has not yet reached a point where he can reach out. He wanted to – but he was incapable of it, and instead walked away, which creates an entirely different dynamic than if he had been able to offer comfort and friendship. In the traditional storyline of the genre, he would have. And it would have been dishonest to his character at this point, and given him nothing to grow into. What he will actually offer to this character in a later section of the book is far greater and is much more true to who he is than if he simply offered a few awkward words and a pat on the back now.

I wrote eleven pages, over the course of the day, completing chapter 4. I need to rewrite the Prophecies, but it’s difficult to write prophecies when the male ushers in the next room have hip hop music playing on their cell phones and are comparing their pudgy lack of abs and how badly they need to go to the gym.

I’m very weary, and not looking forward to yet another 14 hour day. On the train home last night, some jittery guy with an over packed bag suddenly stood up in the train, stripped to his underwear, and changed clothes in the aisle. “Bet you think this is weird,” he said.

“No,” I replied. “I get paid to deal with actors in their underwear. It’s nothing new to me.” And I went back to my book. Because, after all, what more was there to say?

I hope I can revive my spirit today. I’d like to stay in bed and wake up and find it’s tomorrow, but that won’t change what’s happening around me. So I might as well be aware of it and start investigating ways I can do my part to instigate positive change.

For a free issue of any of the above serials, click the appropriate link and download.


At 11:45 AM, Blogger Debra Young said...

Re the guy stripping to his underwear and changing clothes, people never cease to amaze.

Re the political, situation normal, a/f/u.


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